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Afraid to Ask

Do I have biological brothers and sisters?
Sometimes birth parents do have other children and if they do, these would be considered your siblings (brothers or sisters).

Who do I look like?
Looking like someone is very important to all people, kids and adults alike. When you go to a family reunion, everyone you see may have something that makes them look like part of the family. Kids who are adopted can feel left out when this happens. You are not alone with this... a funny expression some adult adoptees use for not feeling like they look like anyone is mirror hunger. Funny, but what they mean is they feel hungry to look in the mirror and see that they look like someone they know. Because of something called genetics we know that the way we look, the color of our hair or eyes comes from our biological parents. Even though you don't know who you look like, you can count on the fact that you do look like either your birth parents or someone else in your birth family.

Did you ever meet my birth parents? or What do my birth parents look like?
Your parents may have met your birth family when they were planning your adoption, or maybe a social worker who helped your parents met your birth family. If you ask your parents and they don't know, ask them if there is a way to find out from the social worker or the adoption agency.

Did it cost anything to adopt me?
It is against the law to ever pay money for a person, child or adult. Adoption can cost money because there are legal papers and services that families will need to pay for when they are adopting. Your parents did not buy you. They did have some expenses because they may have used a lawyer or a social worker to help them, and the services of these professional people do cost money. If they had to travel to another country, they may have had to take a plane and rent a place to stay.

There are many different types of adoption a family may choose. There are different costs for adoptions that take place in the United States and those that occur in another country. Adopting a baby is a different fee from adopting a child that is older. Ask your parents to help you to understand more about this subject.

 
Adults who adopt children are screened very carefully to make sure they will be good parents. Many of them take classes or training.